Wake Me Up When September Ends

I was frustrated, upset to the maximum level and got a headache for hours when I heard the news. It was the day when I should say goodbye to my beloved housemates, the day when I should pack all my stuff and move to Birmingham after lived a year in my super comfy room and house. It was the day when I got news that my cargo was affected by the fire accident in the shipping company’s warehouse that most Indonesian students used to ship their stuff back home. I was trying to be positive and gathered lots of information, some said that all the cargo that collected before 26th August should be safe, mine was collected on 25th August, so I thought mine was okay. The day after, 24th September, I tried to call the company, and they said my stuff could be still in the warehouse and got damage as well. I sent the email to reconfirm. 23rd and 24th September was a very long day with all the moving out-in things, the bad news, and my insecurity of my life for the next four months which full of uncertainty about how to fund myself due to the end of my scholarship at that moment. That night, my very last night in my room, in the house, I decided (tried) to sleep after cleaning the house, but it was so difficult. I cried a lot, and my head was about to explode, it was even harder to breathe like a normal human being. After couple hours suffers, I finally fall asleep. The morning after, I told my dad, then mom called me, tried my best to look stronger but failed. Strangely, I felt bit better after talked with two of them. Logic took over my heart, and I tried to contact my friend, discuss the cargo, and focus on what I can control. So, I was trying to moving on. I concentrate on finding a job here, in Birmingham, and let the Universe do the rest for my “probably damaged” cargo. Today, 29th September, I got the email confirmed that my cargo is one of the hundreds that got affected in the accident. Funny enough, because I wasn’t sad anymore, I even laugh about it. I believed the moment you can laugh at your miserable life, that is the moment you are not on the same level as before, you’re upgrading your level, your class. You learnt that life is about moving from one tragedy to another tragedy, and when you are capable enough to laugh at your tragedy, it means you already move on.

September could be on of the toughest months this year. Saying lots of goodbyes to people that I know, my heart got broken not once or twice but more, my insecurity level increased, shit happened. But, September almost reach its end, so let’s move on!

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