It’s Been a Long Time

Hi, how’s life?

It’s been a while since my last visit here, a place where I can actually write anything anytime, my own blog.

I just realized that I haven’t posted anything for a long time when few days ago I received an email saying that my hosting on this blog was expired.

It’s quite a ride since I came back home six months ago. Oh did I tell you about it? Yes, I am home, it’s been six months already yet it feels surreal to be home, after 6 years wondering around. There are some parts of me keep saying that I don’t belong here, but I don’t have anywhere else to go (at least for now). This is my hometown, my home, where my family lives – even though I’m staying in my own place -, where my businesses based, and where my current job is (yes, I have graduated from Bukalapak on March and now working at Gojek in Makassar).

It was quite a story actually. My initial plan was to graduated from Bukalapak and yes go back home and do full time in Tenoon. Few days after I emailed my resignation letter I got an offer from Gojek, a tempting one since they wanted me to be placed in Makassar, a place that I indeed wanted to go (back). After some consideration, I said yes to the offer and here I am.

Six months in Makassar and still doesn’t feel like settling down or feels like home. But at least good things happened for the last six months. I took a big step and buying my first property (on installment of course). I (finally) put myself into a commitment which unfortunately only lasted for a month, hahahhaa. I finally managed to keep my promise and brought my family on vacation (after 2 years delayed). I was selected to represent Indonesia in a US Embassy program summit in Thailand and continued to Japan on my giveaway trip. I gained weight again and now fighting to reduce them again. I added few businesses on my investment portfolios. My sister got engaged yesterday and made me drained and locked up myself the day after #introvertlife. And everything in between. So many things happened and I still feel unsatisfied. Have no idea why.

I keep questioning (again but now more intense and stressful) my purposes, my dreams. Is it right what I am doing now? I started to lose desire on my work and businesses. I don’t want to be ungrateful but it just feels “weird” or “empty”. I don’t know the perfect word to describe what I’m feeling now.

Some people says that the quarter life crisis actually hits you at 27, not 25. Is it happening now to me? I don’t know.

Hopefully I can update more here.


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